


a special relationship

by spookykingdomstarlight



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Complicated Relationships, Consequences of war, Future Fic, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Pining, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-27
Updated: 2017-11-27
Packaged: 2019-01-26 07:54:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12552768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spookykingdomstarlight/pseuds/spookykingdomstarlight
Summary: Telling Poe no was like trying to beat the rise out of the sun. It was impossible to do and you’d only find yourself burned for the effort.





	a special relationship

**Author's Note:**

  * For [rosecake](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosecake/gifts).



“Don’t you ever get bored of this?”

Terex’s head snapped around at the sound of a voice he hadn’t heard in a very, very long time. It had been long enough that he’d almost forgotten the lazy way the man it belonged to spoke, like he slouched through words the same way he slouched through danger, supremely uninterested in any of it and perfectly willing to let everyone know it. Once upon a time, Terex had found it infuriating. And because Terex wasn’t so very different now as he was then, he still found it so. “Don’t put yourself down too much, Poe Dameron,” he said, hiding his sneer behind a glass filled to the brim with brandy. “Sometimes you’re interesting.”

Poe rolled his eyes and gestured at the empty seat across from Terex. The table was too small for company despite the chair, but that didn’t stop Poe from twisting it around and straddling it. Terex ought to have complained, but he knew enough about inevitability and irresistible forces. Telling Poe no was like trying to beat the rise out of the sun. It was impossible to do and you’d only find yourself burned for the effort. As if to punctuate the point—and to complete the wholly obnoxious tableau to utterly obnoxious perfection—he crossed his arms on the high back of the chair and hooked his chin over his wrists. He affected an innocent mien, eyes wide and mouth free of everything except bland, pointless curiosity.

“It’s nice to know you still care,” Poe said. “You always did say the nicest things.”

If Terex had a knife, he’d have stabbed Poe through the hand with it again.

(He ignored the small, traitorous voice in his head that reminded him that he did, in fact, have a knife on him. Down that path lay trouble and Terex was firmly and irrevocably out of the business of causing trouble.)

“Fuck you,” he settled for instead. Coarse, his voice got hung up on its vowels, found itself somehow even more clipped than usual. It did not hold the accent of a proper Imperial stormtrooper. That was Poe for you, always mangling every bit of Terex’s life and doing so with an ease Terex almost envied. His only consolation had always been that he’d always managed to muck things up for Poe at least as much.

That bland, pointless curiosity on Poe’s lips took on a smarmy quality. “Maybe later.”

Terex’s lip curled, pulling at a scar almost as old as his relationship with Poe. In some ways, it matched a similar scar that now graced Poe’s stupidly handsome features. “Promises,” he said, dry. But even if they were just words—their whole relationship was built on words, words honed to sharp points, words meant for sparring, never meant to go anywhere and never meant to truly hurt—a thrill of anticipation flickered and caught light in Terex’s nerves. He might’ve liked to do just that.

Poe’s eyebrow twitched upward. “Anything is possible. You left the First Order, after all. Most people don’t do that.” For a moment, he couldn’t hide the troubled unhappiness that fact brought to him. He’d never understood how people could fall for the FO’s words, their promises. In a lot of ways, Terex thought, he’d been lucky in his life. The reason why people fell for the FO was because their lives weren’t spent on lush planets redolent of heroic, revered history. They didn’t grow up knowing loving parents or safe environs.

They weren’t given the luxury of ideals, not until the FO shoved the wrong ones into their minds for them.

Now, Terex knew a thing or two about that and it made him sick. He’d never believed the FO’s hype, not the way people like Phasma did, or Hux, but he’d still thought them better than the alternative, a step back onto the right path. Hells, Admiral Sloane was one of the FO’s leaders. Or had been. It didn’t seem like anyone besides Hux had much power left, Hux and his maniacal acolytes. People like Malarus, they deserved to be taken down.

In a way, Poe had taken those illusions away from him, too, not that Poe even realized it. It had taken Terex a long time to figure it out for himself and it wasn’t like he intended to illuminate it for Poe. Poe’s ego was already too big to spend time around comfortably. Inflating it even more would only turn it into a health hazard. All Poe knew was that Terex had done an about-face. He didn’t need to know anything else.

“What are you doing here?” As Terex raised his glass again, he realized he’d managed to drink all the brandy without even noticing. Of course, Poe noticed and snapped his finger at the nearest bartender. Gesturing expansively, he somehow conveyed to the droid that another drink was in order, make that two, one for his friend here. The droid nodded and in a sharp, fuzzy acknowledged them with a simple, “Affirmative.”

“Would you believe me if I told you I needed your help?” One of Poe’s thumbnails scraped at the soft wood of his chair, working a sliver free.

Terex snorted. “No.” He leaned back and crossed his legs. “Though I almost wish it was true. Just because I know you’d hate it.”

Poe chuckled, low and dubious and deeply, darkly amused. “Man, you must not’ve noticed, but I hate just about everything that has to do with you. That’s kind of how it works with us.”

Drawing a deep breath, Terex looked down at his hands, contemplating throttling the man sitting across from him. It might be easy. This wasn’t the finest of establishments. It was entirely possible no one would care. “Charming.”

A smile flitted across Poe’s mouth, there and gone. “I try. Now let’s do this again. And maybe you’ll use your brain this time and believe me.”

“Even if you did need my help, why would I want to help you?” He threw his hand out to fully encompass the entirety of Poe’s being. “There’s nothing about you worth helping.” _Not to mention, you took everything from me_. “In fact, about the only joy I might be able to find in life right now is spiting you.”

Reaching into his jacket, Poe nodded and tsked sympathetically. “I know. Big, bad Poe Dameron took all your toys and what little credibility you had and smashed them into tiny pieces. It’s all very sad and tragic for you.” He retrieved a datapad from his pocket and tossed it across the table, trusting Terex to catch it. “Consider this an apology of sorts.”

Casual, or at least as casual as Terex was capable of being, he flicked the power button and waited for the screen to flare to life and illuminate him as to why Poe was here and not immediately trying to kill him or take him into custody.

It might’ve been a long time, but there wasn’t a statute of limitations for working for the losing side, for believing enough in them that you got yourself lobotomized with bits of cyborg tech before finally realizing they were never, ever going to be what you wanted them to be.

Even if Terex never admitted it aloud, he’d been wrong. He ought to have stayed a crime lord alone instead of joining forces with those sanctimonious, brainwashed freaks in the hopes of rebuilding the Empire he’d known and, still, loved.

How would Poe feel about that? Would his mouth twist in distaste? Would he give up whatever gallant mission had brought him here? Maybe. Unfortunately, Terex was too cognizant of his own wishes to find out. There were a thousand different things he could have said that might have gotten Poe to leave and never come back.

The problem, the eternal, nigh impossible to solve problem, was this: he didn’t want Poe to never come back.

For all that they would never see eye-to-eye about anything except perhaps the FO’s treachery, Terex _liked_ the asshole. He engaged with Terex in a way most other people couldn’t or didn’t. Poe wasn’t a sycophant and he wasn’t a drummed-up superior and, most importantly, he wasn’t afraid to push Terex’s buttons in just the way Terex liked having them pushed.

Finally glancing back down at the screen, Terex found himself almost immediately, fiercely angry. The first thing it showed him was the cruel, cold face of Malarus, sneering at him from some Resistance cell like she had any room to still judge anyone. Not a mark marred her face that hadn’t already been there and she wore a clean, pressed set of coveralls. “You ought to have dumped her in a hole somewhere to rot or, better yet, kill her and have done with it.”

Poe frowned, disapproving, but his response was a little weak and a lot telling. “We don’t do that in the Resistance.” But he clearly wanted to. Those pretty ideals of his held up under scrutiny and Terex knew they always would, but sometimes even the prettiest ideals found themselves strained.

“I’ve heard about the trials. It’s so much harder when you have to justify it to a whole panel of judges, jury, and the galaxy at large, isn’t it?” Terex tsked, sympathetic. “Justice is meted out so slowly these days.”

Poe’s eyes hardened and the fingers of his left hand twitched into a tight fist, one he immediately relaxed. “This is the way it has to be, Terex.” He scraped his hand over stubble that was even thicker these days than Terex remembered. “I didn’t come here to get your take on how war criminals are handled by the Republic justice system. Frankly, I don’t care.”

Terex leaned forward. “Doesn’t it frustrate you, though? Here, the Resistance did all the hard work and sacrificed everything while the Republic sat back and tutted and buried its head in the heaviest dune of sand it could find, and now the Republic steps in to determine just how and when and why your enemies are punished.”

Poe laughed, but it was a bitter, fragile thing. “Nice try, Terex. I don’t know if you remember, but they lost just as much as the rest of us. More, even.” He didn’t need to say it, of course. The specter of Hosnia hung over everything even know that the wound had maybe, maybe begun to heal. Even Terex, who hadn’t given one shit about the place or the Republic or anything else, had been taken aback by that particular strike.

Not that that stopped Terex for long. “But they are a ‘them?’ Interesting.”

Poe realized his mistake and sighed, shrugging. “It’s been a hard transition,” was all he said and Terex, long familiar with him, knew he wouldn’t get anything more about it. Not that he needed it, really. It was clear going back from Resistance leader to Republic citizen had proven hard for him, driven him to a level of resentment Terex could appreciate and empathize with.

For a certain degree of empathy anyway.

“So,” Terex said, feigning lightness and curiosity, “what do you need me for? Do you intend to haul me back for my own trial?”

Poe glared. “Buddy, I don’t give half a shit about what happens to you. Bigger fish to fry.” He sounded like he hated to be that prudent, like forgetting about his own personal vendettas was that easy, and yet, he did it, because deep down inside, he was still that good Resistance soldier of General Organa’s and he would always do what needed to be done instead of what would be most personally satisfying. “I just thought I might present you with an opportunity.”

“Ooh,” Terex said, well aware he was behaving like an asshole now. “An opportunity. How wonderful. Just what I always wanted from a forcibly retired Resistance pilot.”

Pinkness spread across Poe’s cheeks and he swallowed audibly, his hands clenching again. Shoving himself to his feet, he nearly knocked over the chair he’d sat in. He intended to storm past Terex and leave without another word—that chord had clearly struck too deeply; Terex was almost sorry—because Terex didn’t want that, not at all. Hand shooting out, he grabbed Poe by the wrist.

“Sorry,” he said. Regret was an unfamiliar emotion for him; he wasn’t even sure he felt it now. “That wasn’t fair.”

Poe wrenched his arm out of Terex’s grip. “Kriff you, pal. I don’t want your pity.”

“Good thing you don’t have it,” and Terex at least meant that much. Poe was a lot of things, but pitiable wasn’t one of them. “Seriously. What _do_ you want if it doesn’t involve locking me up, too? I have no illusions about what you think of me.”

Poe huffed and threw his hands up, stomping back the scant feet to the seat he’d so violently abandoned. “I thought you might want to testify against her,” he said. “That’s all.”

“You need more evidence?” Terex found that unlikely.

Now it was Poe’s turn to sneer. “I want her nailed for every little thing I can get her for.”

Ah. _Ah_. That, at least, made sense. “Having someone testify that she’d used cybernetic implants to enslave someone would be a boon, I suppose.” He bit the inside of his cheek. Frankly, he was perfectly happy to forget that time in his life and move on. People did what they had to do and Malarus was no different. In the end, he’d gotten free. Going in, he’d known what would happen. That probably didn’t count for much, but it was how Terex got through the day. Knowing he’d won in his small way, that was enough.

And now Poe wanted to give him a little more, even if it was for self-serving reasons.

Hating himself a little bit, he said, “What do you need?” Were it for anyone else, he’d have probably shot them in the face and walked away, happy to go about his life and let Malarus hang in limbo for all time. It wouldn’t have been satisfying, but he was nobody’s dog; he wouldn’t come calling simply for a bone thrown his way.

“Sworn testimony.” Poe glanced around. “Recorded in whatever passes for the local law enforcement’s office.” The way he said it, a little cagey and a little too fast, suggested it would be a bit more complicated than that. Probably, they’d need to set up a holofeed with one of the tribunal’s lawyers. Maybe more. He lifted his hands. “I’ve already gotten limited immunity for you, short term, only for the length of a couple of weeks. You’ve got a free pass here, but if someone finds you again…”

Somehow, Terex got the feeling he meant if Poe himself found him again.

“Yes, yes. I understand.” So this was what the Republic did now. It made deals with the enemy to get a bigger enemy. Terex was almost impressed, almost pleased. Poe, the Resistance, they were always almost good enough. He wondered how much it bothered Poe to be the one to do it here. Either way, Terex was glad it was him. He didn’t anticipate their paths would cross much any longer and he mourned that fact. Especially if it meant Terex might be hauled to Republic jail if they did find one another again.

He hadn’t realized quite how much he’d missed his very handsome, very personal nemesis until he was sitting across from him. “Do you ever miss it?” he asked, idle, unsure if he wanted the answer or not. “The cleanliness of the fight?”

Poe snorted, looking Terex up and down. “I wouldn’t call it _clean_.” The back of his hand scrubbed across his chin. “But the lines were a lot less blurry back then, weren’t they?”

That was as much of an admission as Terex was ever likely to get. It wasn’t nearly as charming or as romantic as he might have wanted it to be, but that hardly mattered, did it? They weren’t a charming or romantic pair. They weren’t a pair at all, even though sometimes Terex may have wanted them to be, even if only for a short time. Just to see what it was like.

And yet despite that, it was almost enough.

“You’ve got me. For as long as you need me,” Terex said. It was the only thing he could give Poe that he might want.

It was almost worth it.


End file.
